Today is a fun date because it's my official due date! August 17th...and instead of having a baby I'm loving on my 8 week old at home. We were only off by a little bit ;)
For those of you who haven't heard, we actually got to bring James David home 2 weeks ago today! Once they began the countdown (5 days) for no apnea spells he just knocked them out. Guess he finally decided he wanted to come home. Since being at home he has been wonderful! There was a little bit of concern on my part whether he'd have another apnea spell at home and being able to recognize it but thankfully that hasn't been an issue.
I get asked a lot how we are doing. It's a great question! After all I have two children under 17 months living under my roof. The answer is AMAZING!! I can't get over how truly awesome it has been thus far. I feel like I always need to qualify my answer to this question with a, "I'm sure that there will be hard days ahead but" because I have loved having 2 children so much. While it's not easy taking care of everyone and getting up all hours of the night for feedings and such it has been a much simpler experience than I expected.
I truly thought this would be horrific. Two kids, super close in age...the one thing I heard from people constantly before James was born and they found out how close our kids would be was, "Wow! You're going to be busy/tired!"and/or "You didn't plan it that way, did you?". That's a very understandable response. I thought I was going to be pretty tired too. In fact, I often joked with Matt that we just needed to be prepared for about 5 years of awful and then it would be over. We intentionally planned our children to be close together (not 14 months but you get the picture) but we did it knowing it would make for a tough season. We thought the end goal would be worth it though.
When I prayed for my kids it never crossed my mind to ask that this be a season of joy and fun. I always prayed to survive! For strength and mental toughness, that kind of thing. I felt positive that this would be a season of surviving and not thriving. I was wrong. Again, there will be tough days and we are only 14 days into it! But thus far having two kids under the age of 17 months has been such a joyful time. I have LOVED being a mother of two. I don't feel stressed or overwhelmed or in need of rescuing. I feel blessed and like I'm having the time of my life.
I'll be honest. I didn't feel that way with just one baby. Ellie was a major adjustment. None of my expectations for motherhood came true. None of my expectations for a baby came true. It was a tough time for all of us between her surprise NICU stay for jaundice, her colic, her milk protein allergies and everything else. I struggled daily till she was about 8 months old. With JD, I've better known what to expect...or just not to expect anything at all!
Ellie is at the most delightful stage, she's exploring everything and she's so curious and adorable...she melts my heart constantly. Watching her interact with James is so amazing. She's so gentle with him and just caring. How she knows that this is her little brother I don't know but she loves him so perfectly. God has taken what I anticipated to be a season of stress and turned it into a season of joy. And I am so thankful!
Don't misunderstand. I'm still tired. There's still a lot of poop involved. Showering everyday is a challenge (and one I lose on occasion!). All of the normal things that happen with a newborn are happening. But I am so filled with gratitude for my family that all of the tough stuff just gets overshadowed by His grace and mercy. I always thought it was kind of a silly 'Christian' joke that when God is active in your life even the mundane has purpose. But I totally get it now. I may just be changing stinky diapers and reading to a toddler but the joy it brings me can only be because God has taken my boring daily living and given it meaning. I think that can be true no matter what you're doing (which is the thing I never believed before!). No matter what your job or your situation or your season of life, God can give it purpose and make it a time of fulfillment and joy.
